Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Love & Respect



I  decided to open up truthfully to you ladies about something that me and a few wives I follow on blogs decided to talk about. Because it is something very real, and very precious to my heart. Its the idea of "Respecting our husbands" and "Submitting". Why is the idea of "submitting" seem so hard and makes you look weak? I can tell you first hand why... FEAR. I struggled with it, and understand why we think this way. Its the fear of being told what to do, and losing yourself. But to be honest, if you truly submit to your husband the way GOD planned, he will love you 10X's more than you have ever experienced. And it wont be a one sided relationship, he will honor you and your thoughts.
 "Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." Ephesians 5:22-24
 Since I've truly started to RESPECT and Submit to my husband, our relation has never been stronger and full of love. I have fallen in love with him all over again. And I have seen the love he has for me, and it is awesome! And I will say I get odd looks from some friends I haven't seen in a long time, and they ask why am I like that? Because it is what God ordained in Marriage.
A little over 8yrs ago, on April 24, 2004, I said "I DO" to the man of my dreams! He was a US Marine, due to deploy to Iraq a short 4 months later. But I knew I wanted to be his wife, and spend every second I could with him before he deployed. I was his and he is mine. I loved him, and thought the world of him! I called him My Hero, and proudly said to everyone "He's my HUSBAND".  Yet with my actions, I was saying something else. I was disrespecting him by making my own decisions, and doing what I wanted to do. And in ways ruling over him, by ignoring his ideas. This went on for about 4yrs, the first 2 he was deployed, so it didn't effect much mainly because we weren't together for long. When we where together, we focused on just being together again. But when the first year we where together, it started to show. I didn't notice because to me I was free and doing what I wanted to do.
Then we had our son, and it changed the dynamic of our relationship, I went from ruling over, to ignoring him. I focused on myself and my son. I forgot all about my husband, and his needs. Not making him feel important and not showing him respect. Then our church started a "Love & Respect" campaign for Marriages. And I learned A LOT at that study... It opened A LOT of conversations that we ignored because we didn't want to fight about it. And it also allowed me to HEAR my husband, not just listen, but actually hear what he was saying (actions too). It helped open my a lot of areas in my life that just wasn't right. And for me to see that it wasn't right...
And when I started to become a stay at home mom, and focus on my family, I not only discovered my purpose as a mother, but also a Wife! The joys that come when you embrace God's plan for you in your role as a Homemaker, and a Wife, is indescribable. I not only do I get to see my children grow in the ways of the Lord, but I also see my husband become an amazing Daddy. Because I encourage and stand beside my husband. I allow him to step in and take the Leadership role in our family.
  "Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.  

 She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life. 

She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
“Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

                                                                Psalms 31:11-12,27-30
I've started to do a little something different. We talked about how he loved when I great him when he came home, back when we where first married. Then I decided to try to have a drink for when he comes home, next to his chair with the TV turned on. And I greet him with a hug and kiss, and then I allow the kids to get in on greeting daddy too. This just shows him that his family missed him, and is grateful that he works hard to provide for our family.
I love showing Honor to my husband, and I encourage you to start or continue to Honor and Respect your husband.

Blessings,
Tina
Please feel free to leave a comment, or tips on how to ENCOURAGE our Husbands!


Also follow this link to read more blogs about Honor our husbands!
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2 comments:

  1. Great Blog Post Tina! I too learned the hard way about how to treat my husband. When we were dating I use to degrade him in front of others. I really didn't know I was doing it. I learned from reading "For Her Eyes Only" that when we disrepect him in front of others, we are tearing them down. In my eyes, I was just letting the world know I was angry, but in his eyes I was telling him how much he wasn't a man. Men need words of affirmation and actions like you stated here. The more we build them up, the more manly they feel and become! Great Recommendation too! Often times we feel stressed because we've been with the kiddos all day and usually our husbands get knocked out with it as soon as he walks in the door, so greeting him with a drink and a kiss, I am sure, is a much greater reward for working all day! Blessings!!

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  2. Thank you Amber... For sharing your honesty and openness.. I do love how something so small can change things so big... Keep honoring Mike :-) blessings to you two....

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